How embracing resistance helps me to Get Things Done

There was a time in my life when i used to go to work every morning, crying and in despair.

I did not want to be in this job anymore, but out of fear i didn’t allow these feelings to move me into action. What i feared was the sense of failure. And i didn’t know where to find my way out. I was exhausting myself by moving away from the truth that was shouting to my face, because i was afraid to face it.

I was naming all the good things about this job, pushing myself to believe them and push away the feelings of despair that existed deep within.

Eventually, the decision was made for me. I had exhausted myself enough to be burned out, sick, unable to work for months.

Embrace resistance

Do you know this feeling when you’re ‘supposed’ to do something, but you don’t feel like doing it at all? It may be as simple as doing the dishes, or taking your kids from school. Or it may be as deeply rooted as being with your partner or taking care of your kids… or even living your life altogether.

Here is one thing that i found incredibly helpful in dealing with the stuff in our lives that we would rather NOT have there:

Embrace your resistance.

Among other things, embracing your resistance will help you:

1. Get things done anyway
2. Show you what you truly value
3. Change anything you want

How does that work?

So embracing is the opposite of resisting, right? Suppose i feel great resistance in finishing a task, such as finishing my ebook.

As long as i resist my resistance, it has a piece of me. I am slave to the experience of resisting. I may hate the task, think badly of myself, get angry at the circumstances that put me here or just close off my feelings altogether, finding excuses to make it all seem right while deep inside, it doesn’t feel alright.

All these things can come from resisting resistance (or any experience):

Procrastination (putting off till tomorrow), shame, self-hatred, guilty feelings, loss or uncontrollable increase of sexual drive, loss of energy, physical ailments, loss of creativity, addiction, irritability, thrill-seeking, exhaustion, aggression, apathy, depression… and much, much more.

Maybe i have even found a spiritual path that helps me to move away from what is going on inside. It may look like ‘noting, knowing, letting go’ as is taught in Vipassana meditation, for example, but actually be my ‘advanced’ way of moving away from my experience.

Or my spiritual practice may tell me i need to open up all my chakras, one by one, and only then i will be free. Until then, i am not enough, more work needs to be done and my suffering continues.

Sadly, where i am now, i see this happening all the time.

This is why i propose to embrace whatever IS in this very moment. Especially if it looks ugly. When i consciously embrace, it’s like shouting a cosmic YES. In daily life, it may sound like this:

“YES, I really deeply wish i wouldn’t need to finish this project right now. I just want to curl up on the couch.”
“YES, i really f*cking hate having to do this right now!”
“YES, i don’t like meeting this person at ALL.”

Can you feel the difference?

Embracing any thoughts and feelings of resistance will help you rise beyond. You will see that acknowledging whatever is, opens up space immediately. I have seen people burst out in deep unstoppable laughter of relief just because they could finally allow what was here all the time into the fullness of their experience.

This one who is aware of the experience, is free.

(If you still believe you are not free, look deeper until you find the place where you are. People come to realize this Freedom in prison and during the holocaust.)

Embracing resistance to whatever is, will help you…

1. Get things done anyway

Some things just need doing. We all live in a human body that needs to be taken care of. We may have children under our guidance and we may have made commitments to people and causes.

Maybe you fear that once you acknowledge these feelings of resistance, you will not do your obligations anymore. But realize this; you are setting yourself free. From this Freedom, truth and insight arises. You will finally be free to say:

YES i hate doing this AND i will still do it because i love my kids and this is the commitment i made and CHOOSE to hold.

We are free to feel resistance and choose to get things done anyway. We may feel uncomfortable, it may be unpleasurable, but because we are aware of the fullness of our experience and everything in it, we are ALL THE MORE free to go ahead and sort our stuff.

2. Show you what you truly value

Because we are no longer closing off, our experience is full. In full, open awareness, our deepest longings and truths will reveal themselves.

Your resistance is telling you something. It may just be telling you that you don’t like something. That’s fine, no biggie! Outsource it next time or choose to just do this thing you don’t like and be happy about it.

Or… it may be your heart speaking to you that you are not living in truth. Maybe you no longer wish to work for this employer. Maybe your relationship needs an honest meeting in truth. Maybe you need help in caring for your kids, to free up space for your own creative expression.

Embracing your resistance will open you up to the full experience of being You and from there, your answers will effortlessly bubble up.

3. Change anything you want

If you wanted to change the weather, you probably couldn’t. But you can be happy and in flow regardless. You are Free. And from this freedom, you can always ask yourself: what is my next step?

Is it to drop into being to listen to your inner voice, or to step into action? Do what needs to be done, and find your Freedom inside. This will change everything. Start practicing this and you will find that wherever you walk, the ground will come up to meet you. Go check for yourself; for this knowing has to come from your own experience.

And please… if you wish, share your experiences. I’d be very happy to hear them!

I write more on this in my ebook. You can download it by clicking the link and leaving your name and email.

2017-04-17T20:51:39+00:00

About the Author:

I love being creative in helping people (and their businesses) glow. As a person and an entrepreneur, my motivation is to live a free, happy and meaningful life and to inspire and support others in doing the same. I create websites for socially conscious entrepreneurs, write articles, cater retreats and facilitate workshops, often traveling, while mostly based in The Netherlands. Connection is key, so drop me a line in the comments or head over to the contact page!

One Comment

  1. Arienne December 19, 2016 at 11:55 am - Reply

    Lovely helped to just clear my resistance! <3

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